What to Do If You Are a Single Mom Struggling With Depression
Depression colors every aspect of your life with a coat of gray. Some mornings, you may lack the energy to get out of bed. However, you don’t have the option to be a slug when you have kids to feed.
Single moms struggling with depression have an incredibly hard row to hoe. Worse, their condition may affect their children’s mental health, increasing their risk of substance abuse disorders and suicide. It’s tough to do your best, but taking care of yourself and your needs is vital. You can’t pour from an empty pitcher.
However, the present society hardly makes it easy to get the care and support you need. What are your legitimate options? Here’s what to do if you are a single mom struggling with depression.
- Realize You Are Not Alone
Depression can isolate you, shrinking your world until it fits into your veil of despair. However, even though you may feel utterly alone, please take heart in knowing that you’re not. One in every five American adults has a mental health disorder, with anxiety and depression leading the pack. That’s millions of people who feel like you do.
Depression can make you feel anything but social. However, it’s critical to connect with others. Do you have someone in your circle with whom you can establish a weekly check-in call or, better yet, an in-person chat? Merely connecting with others can sometimes bust the blues.
However, maybe you need someone who “gets it,” and you’re the only one you know battling depression. If so, why not investigate one of the many online support groups for people with this disorder? Many people find meeting up online less intimidating than in person. Such individuals can offer genuine empathy when you’re in your darkest hours and point out the cognitive distortions that keep you trapped in a negative loop.
- However, Take Your Symptoms Seriously
Whatever you do, please don’t dismiss your depression as “just a part of adult life.” While everyone has the occasional blue mood, it isn’t normal to walk around feeling like you have a gray cloud surrounding you all the time.
Begin by keeping notes on your symptoms. You can find scores of free apps like Woebot that help you track your mood. Checking in is simple and takes less than two minutes. Within two or three weeks, you should start to recognize a pattern. How often do you select words like “lonely” or “sad” versus “happy” or “content?”
If you notice your mood is negative more often than positive, seek help if it’s realistically possible. However, if you’re among the millions already burdened by high healthcare costs — perhaps one cause of your despair — you might have to go a bit renegade. Consider it an opportunity to empower yourself with knowledge.
- Become Your Own Best Therapist
The internet is a double-edged sword if you’re a single mom struggling with depression. On the one hand, social media can bring you low as you see friend after friend buying homes when you’re stuck on the endless rental roller coaster. However, it’s also a treasure trove of positive psychological information and self-help — if you know where to look.
Begin with the most reliable sources. Publications like Psychology Today have stood the test of time. Seek medical journals, but be aware that many hide behind paywalls. However, the National Institutes for Health have an impressive database of information and quickly add new studies to it.
YouTube is another surprisingly useful resource. Channels such as Doc Snipes may have begun with fellow counselors in mind but nevertheless present complex psychological concepts in an easy-to-understand format. It’s much clearer than many university lectures.
You can find channels dedicated to neurobiology, cognitive-behavioral therapy, dialectical behavioral therapy, addiction — pretty much anything pertaining to the mind.
- Nurture Your Physical Self
Depression affects your physiology — and vice versa. The way you treat your body can aggravate or relieve your symptoms.
Look into changing your diet to include more brain-healthy nutrients. Nuts and seeds contain high magnesium, selenium and zinc levels, all vital for cognitive function. In fact, in one study, depressed people who were deficient in magnesium recovered better from a supplement than those taking a tricyclic antidepressant. Additionally, eat more fatty fish, as the omega-3 content likewise promotes healthy neurobiology. If you’re a vegan, try adding chia or flax seeds to your next salad or wrap to up your intake of this nutrient.
It may be the last thing you want to do, but exercise is one of the best antidepressants. Try this trick: If you don’t feel like working out, promise to do so for just five minutes. Let yourself quit at the end of that time — but you’ll often keep going.
- Consider Talking to Your Employer
Talking to your employer about mental health issues can cause valid concerns. In some workplaces, you might feel safer staying mum about your battles.
However, consider talking to your employer if they seem supportive. Are there accommodations they could make that would let you seek treatment more easily, such as telecommuting a few days a week? Do they offer an employee assistance program connecting you with affordable or free mental health services?
What to Do If You’re a Single Mom With Depression
Struggling with depression is tough for single moms. You need to manage your condition, so it doesn’t affect your children.
Follow the tips above for what to do if you’re a single mom with depression. The way out may seem hard, but a sunnier day awaits you.
