How to Cope With Divorce While Pregnant 

There are few things in life that are more stressful and difficult than getting divorced. Pregnancy is one of them. Carrying a baby in the womb has many undesirable consequences, as negative emotions strike you twice as hard, and you simply need all kinds of support to get through it. 

Having a good, understanding spouse can help you with that, but matters get a little more complicated when your partner is not all that great, and you’ve made the decision to get divorced while you’re pregnant. Not only can it negatively impact the development of your baby, but there are also legal hurdles you will need to overcome in order to finally break free. 

For example, you may already know how to file for divorce in Texas, but did you know that you might need to wait until you’ve given birth for your divorce to get finalized? This is a standard procedure in many other states as well. The reasoning behind it is to determine paternity in order to avoid unnecessary future court dates to establish child support and custody rights. 

The legal conundrums are just one of the many things you have to deal with when filing for a divorce during pregnancy. Continue reading to learn more about how to push through this difficult and uncertain time without inflicting avoidable trauma on yourself and your unborn child. 

Consider Lawyering Up 

Divorce lawyers don’t have the best reputation out there, and in many cases, it’s for a good reason. They tend to meddle in couples’ personal affairs to an unreasonable extent in order to barter for the largest divorce settlement, without giving their clients’ personal feelings a second thought. Oftentimes, the break-up of a marriage is a perfectly courteous and civilized manner, until the lawyers get involved. If you’ve seen Marriage Story, you probably know all about the perils of involving lawyers in divorce proceedings. 

On the other hand, though, certain cases require third parties with legal expertise to make the process smoother. Getting a divorce with a baby on the way certainly qualifies for that category. Pregnancy is not the most convenient time to be divorcing a spouse, and if you’re set on following through with it, chances are that you really can’t be around that person anymore. 

If that’s the case, then hiring an attorney can keep you from seeing one another too often, and even get most of the procedure out of the way with minimal involvement on your side. Being pregnant requires a lot of rest and mental peace, and lawyering up can certainly help you with that. 

An experienced divorce lawyer is going to handle negotiations and filings so you are not pulled into unnecessary back-and-forth during a sensitive time. This kind of support allows you to focus on your health while knowing the legal side is being managed responsibly.

Find Ways to Deal With the Negative Emotions 

Even if you weren’t pregnant, it would be a good idea to come up with various ways of coping with all the rollercoaster of emotions you may feel when getting divorced. When you’re carrying a child, you were in the middle of that ride before filing for separation. 

It’s important to remember about self-care, even in the direst of circumstances. It can be anything from taking SPA days more often than usual or spending a lot of time with your friends and family. Anything that gets your mind off of the divorce proceedings is good, as long as it doesn’t involve any activities that are harmful to your baby. 

Keep the Future in Mind 

Since the beginning of history, it’s been known that the presence of both parents in a child’s life has a positive effect on the development of your baby. As long as your spouse is not abusive or completely unreliable and irresponsible, you should consider coming up with some sort of a parenting plan that keeps them in the picture. 

Additionally, you should have at least a vague idea of what you want all of the family law-related matters to look like before you begin the procedure. Divorce while pregnant is complicated enough, and getting some of that stuff out of the way early can grant you greater peace of mind later on in the process. 

Although separating from your spouse can feel like a deeply intimate and personal issue, that is not the case when you’re breaking up in the middle of a pregnancy. You should always keep in mind what’s best for your baby, even if it’s not the most convenient solution for you. 

The Bottom Line 

There is no easy way to make the process of separating from your spouse smooth and straightforward. Even in the case of the most understanding partners, complications are bound to occur. Divorce while pregnant is even trickier, as you have to keep in mind your baby’s well-being throughout the process, not to mention the emotional strain that being pregnant can have on a woman. 

In the middle of the proceedings, you shouldn’t forget about the future of your child and the best possible options for their development. Although the divorce takes up most of your free time and seems to be the only thing you’re occupied with, keep in mind that it’s not more important than the life growing inside of you. 

Maciej Grzymkowski – an avid traveler with a particular affinity for Southeast Asia. During my travels, I spend most of the time studying interpersonal relationships and how we, as humans, differ in our understanding and symbolism of love, hate, and everything in between.