Are they twins???

There hasn’t been a single day since Megan came along that somebody hasn’t looked at my two girls and asked me, “Are they twins?”. Even when Megan was just a tiny new born and Eva a chunky 15 month old, there was always one who would take in the double buggy and comment, “Oooh twins!!” and I spent the first year of their lives biting my tongue and refraining from exploding with rage at their stupidity!!

At first I honestly didn’t see it, I would look at them both, just 15 months between them and Megan seemed so much darker, the blue of her eyes so much deeper, the shape of her face so very different to that of her big sister. And yet as she grew, catching up in height, over taking in weight (!!) and becoming blonder by the day, I realised that actually, they DID look like twins, that to passing strangers and even those who knew us well, they really were more alike than I ever realised.

There are times when I watch them from a distance, when their hair is tied up in pigtails so I can’t differentiate between the length, and I find myself getting confused over which one is which. When I am busy at home, feeding Harry with one hand and putting in a load of washing with the other, I often look down and mistake one little blonde head for the other. And when they lie in their double buggy, snuggled up in a winter blanket, their little eyes closed tight, I sometimes struggle to tell the difference between them, their features so similar that it takes my breath away.

I suppose it doesn’t help that nine times out of ten, the girls are dressed very similar. I never planned to dress them the same, assuming that Megan would wear all of Eva’s cast-offs which would save a huge amount of money but also meant that they would both be dressed very differently. And that worked for a while, Megan wore all of Eva’s beautiful babygros and we would look at her all gooey eyed, nostalgically asking eachother, “Do you remember when Eva wore that?” and it felt as though we had stepped back in time. But then Megan grew faster than we ever expected, chunking out and shooting up so that in not time at all they were in the same size clothes, shoes and it became easier to buy two of everything!!

At first, when I still tried to dress them differently, there would be an almighty melt down each morning. “But I wanted the pink jumper!!!” or, “I want to wear a dress like Megan!”. And on the occasions when they would wear the same, at first just for special occasions, parties, weddings, they would dance around the living room hand in hand singing, “We’re the same! We’re the same!!” and I realised that my girls, however different, loved to match!!

And as alike as they are, with their big blue eyes and their beautiful blonde hair, they could not be any more different if they tried. Eva, as the big sister, is sensitive, unassuming, quiet and reserved where as Megan is domineering, loud and very much the boss of the two!! Where as Eva enjoys arts, crafts and books, Megan enjoys climbing, jumping around the garden, making as much noise as possible. When they argue Eva is the first to cry, will scream at me to help her, run to my arms for safety instead of standing up to Megan and telling her, “I’m the big sister!!”. Megan will never back down, never let go of something she wants, will win every fight hands down and is quick to lash out when things don’t go her way.

But despite this, even though Megan can be difficult to live with at times and poor Eva takes the brunt of it, Eva fiercely protects her and remains true to her role of big sister. Even if two minutes earlier Megan has pulled out a handful of her hair, she will still rush to her aid should she fall over, should she cry or need something out of her reach. “Here you go Megan!” she will tell her, patting her lovingly on the back or holding her hand for comfort. The nursery staff at pre-school are forever telling me how when Eva plays, she will choose one doll for herself and another which she tells them, “This one is for Megan!”. Should she bring home a biscuit or a cake she has made at nursery, she will immediately split it in half to share with her sister, and it’s just the loveliest thing to witness.

And Megan, when she wants to be, can be the most loving little sister there is. When she’s not angry or frustrated or feeling poorly, she can be affectionate and kind and will shower Eva with compliments, with cuddles and kisses. When Eva comes home from pre-school three times a week, Megan will be waiting at the front door and will shout, “Yayyyy! My sister’s home!” before Eva has even got down the front drive. She will jump on her with cuddles, nestle up to her on the couch and tell her, “Me missed you Eva!!”. Those are my favourite moments, the moments that make up for the screaming, the shouting, the, “You’re not my friend!!!”.

Although my girls could pass for twins, and admittedly they even tell people that they are twins, “We are twins!! We’re the same!!” they will sing, they are very much their own characters, their own individual little people who very much balance each other out. For every crazy Meggy moment, there is a very sensible, thoughtful moment from Eva. But sometimes their mannerisms, the things that they say, their gestures and pronunciation of certain words is so similar that it takes me by surprise. I have never known two little girls, two sisters, so strongly connected or so close that when one feels something, the other instinctively feels it too.

I take hundreds of photos of the girls, far too many to ever share with you, and yet my favourite photo is still this. My two little blondies, their own mirror image, bound by the invisible strings of sisterhood, connected by something stronger than I could ever understand.