For Meggy, My Little Wild One

Meggy,

Where do I even begin to start writing this letter to you? How can I ever find the words to tell you just how much I love you, how proud I am of you, how utterly wonderful you are in so many ways, and yet, in the same breath, tell you how much I am struggling at being your Mummy right now?

From the very second you were born I realised that being your Mummy was never going to be easy, from the shock of your speedy birth, to the two long weeks spent in neonatal. I can still remember sitting beside your incubator, holding your tiny hand in mine, knowing that you had changed me in those moments, that my life would never be the same again.

And I was right.

During those early years our whole world revolved around you. Our every move would depend on how you were feeling that day, how many times you’d had us up screaming that night, whether you would ever stop crying for long enough for us to dare to leave the house at all. You pushed me to my limits and back again, you broke me and rebuilt me, and along the way you made me question everything I knew about myself, my sanity, and about being a Mummy.

And five and a half years later it has all come flooding back. All of a sudden, I am that same Mummy right there in the hospital, holding your tiny hand in mine, willing you to be healthy, wanting you to be happy, hoping for all our sakes that we can find a way through.

The last twelve months have been incredibly difficult for you. You’ve dealt with so much illness, undergone so many tests, scans and appointments, more than any little girl your age should ever have to endure. It has broken my heart to see you unwell, it has killed me to watch you lay in those scanners, to hold back my own tears and wipe away your own, to hear your cries at every blood test, every examination, every day you have woken in pain. It is desperately unfair what you have had to go through, and if I could take it all away, I would in a heartbeat.

But now the dust has settled, with positive results and hopeful consultants, and we have been left with the return of a very confused and angry little girl who flips from one extreme to the other at the flick of a switch. Where as on the one hand you are the most loving, sweet, kind, and intelligent child, on the flip side you are angry, violent, destructive, emotional. And whilst it is physically and mentally draining for you, it is equally difficult for me.

I’ll be honest with you Meggy, there have been times when I have questioned whether this was personal. There have been moments when I’ve asked myself, is it me that’s the problem here? Did I do something wrong? Did I not give you enough time, enough love, enough attention? Is it simply a case of you not liking me very much at all? Because at nursery, and now at school, you are an angel. Your teachers tell me you are a model pupil, they sing your praises both academically and at play. They tell me you are friendly, polite, sociable, surpassing your goals, sailing through your work, a delight to teach and eager to please. And honestly Megs, when I hear them talk about you in that way I can’t help but wonder why it is that they get the very best of you and I am left with the very worst.

Because from the moment I pick you up at school each day I see the look on your face as you walk over to greet me, the flicker in your eyes, the change in the tone, and you are quite literally a ticking time bomb the entire walk home. And like clockwork, the very second we get inside the house, by the time your shoes are off and the door is locked, I watch you unravel and fall to pieces before my very eyes.

And I hold my hands up and admit that when you’re lying on the floor in front of me, kicking and screeching and lashing out at anyone and anything, I ask myself why you have to behave this way? When you’re crying for hours on end every meal time, every bed time, I wonder why we have to go through this same rigmarole every single night without fail? When you’re still screaming down the house at 9, 10, 11 o’ clock at night, when we’re all tired and exhausted and our last scrap of patience is lost, I ask myself how much more of this we can take?

And then last week you finally broke me. After months of bad behaviour, of late nights and hysterical mornings, I booked an appointment to speak to your teacher and honestly, it broke my heart. I can’t even begin to tell you how difficult it was to sit her down, a lady who sees nothing but the very best in you, and reel off your worst qualities, share all of your failings, and list all of the reasons why the little girl who sits in her class each day is not the same little girl who comes home to me each night. It felt like the ultimate betrayal and I hated myself for breaking your trust, for letting you down, and for sharing your secrets.

And yet as I sat there crying, well and truly at my wits end, ashamed at having to ask for support to parent my own child, embarrassed at our lack of control over your behaviour at home, mortified to have others judge me in that way, I still felt the most incredible amount of relief at having shared that burden. And actually Meggy, your teacher didn’t judge me, or berate me, or tell me that I was failing as a Mother; she didn’t point the finger, or disagree with me, or tell me where I was going wrong. She merely listened to me, understood me, and sympathised with me; she simply reassured me, comforted me, and supported me. And sitting here writing this, tears streaming down my face, I hope you understand that sometimes, even as grown ups, we still need that from time to time. We still need somebody else to tell us that we are doing everything right, even when it feels as though we are getting everything wrong.

And I was shocked when your teacher told me how you rush into school every Monday morning, filled with stories of our latest adventures; how you love to tell her all of the wonderful things we do together as a family, the places we go, the moments for just you and I, your memories from long ago, your dreams and plans for the future. And she told me, regardless of how I may feel right now at rock bottom, and despite the way you behave towards me at times, that you always speak of me with so much love, and joy, and happiness.

And that was all I needed to hear. 

The truth is Megs, being a parent is hard work, and yet being five and a half years old is equally tough. Just as I’m still trying to work out how to be a parent to you, you’re still trying to work out your own place within our family. In the same way that I am juggling all of these emotions and thoughts whirling around my own head, you are doing exactly the same thing but without the emotional maturity to process it all. And as much as I am able to try and make sense of it all right here, writing down my thoughts and feelings in the hope that one day you will read this back and understand, you are doing exactly the same when you lash out, when you scream and cry, when you say hateful things, or have heavy hands.

You are simply trying to make sense of the world, and I can only imagine how over-whelming that must be for you. 

I don’t know what the future holds Meggy, I don’t know if what we are dealing with today will run into weeks, months, years, or a lifetime. I don’t know if this is a behavioural issue, a psychological issue, a physical issue, or just simply who you are. But I promise you this, whatever happens, and wherever this leads us, I will fight your corner every step of the way. I will love you, support you, comfort you, and I will forgive you for all of your outbursts, and all of your wrong doings, just as long as you promise to always forgive mine.

I love you all the stars in the sky,

My beautiful little wild one. 

Love Mummy

xxxxxx

 

 

 

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80 Comments

  1. January 28, 2019 / 7:48 pm

    After a tough parenting day this post brought a tear to my eye. Beautiful words as always. I have no advice but I do want to say there is nothing wrong with needing support, we will no doubt all need support from others at some point. Sending love x

    • Laura Dove
      Author
      January 29, 2019 / 2:03 pm

      Thank you Natalie, it feels a huge relief to share all this. Sometimes things always feel worse when you bottle them up! xx

  2. January 28, 2019 / 8:30 pm

    Beautifully worded, honest and real. There are times I have felt just like this x

    • Laura Dove
      Author
      January 29, 2019 / 2:03 pm

      Thank you so much, it’s good to know it’s not just me. xx

  3. January 28, 2019 / 8:37 pm

    It is tough at times isn’t it and I have certainly found that with the start of school. My once cute little boy isn’t recognisable at times but I am hoping that it will pass quite quickly and we can forget it ever happened. All the best to you xx

    • Laura Dove
      Author
      January 29, 2019 / 2:04 pm

      So hard!! This is relentless, pretty much five and a half years solid (with brief periods where things settled), and we are all exhausted! I really hope that things improve for all our sakes, but mostly for hers. xx

  4. January 28, 2019 / 8:46 pm

    I forget where I read it but the gist was that unravelling and becoming very naughty is normal for kids because you are their safe space and they cannot let themselves go to that extent in school. They trust you enough to be horrid when they come home. My two certainly do (and they’re 11 and 9).
    I am sure it absolutely isn’t you. Schools these days seem to be real pressure cookers for kids and I swear they expect far more from them than ever was expected from my generation. That, on top of everything else your daughter has gone through may be a factor. xxx

    • Laura Dove
      Author
      January 29, 2019 / 2:05 pm

      Thank you Linda. So many people have said the same to me about this, that actually its a wonderful thing that she trusts me enough and feels comfortable with me that she can fall apart in that way. I know that doesn’t help in the moment, but its reassuring at least. xx

  5. January 28, 2019 / 9:06 pm

    I almost cried reading this. So beautifully written. My youngest has such strong emotions that sometimes I don’t know how to deal with them. I too feel like I struggle to be her Mum! Sending huge hugs xx

    • Laura Dove
      Author
      January 29, 2019 / 2:05 pm

      Ahh thank you Amy. It is SO hard isn’t it? I barely even feel like a grown up myself, let alone know how to deal with situations such as this. Lots of love to you too. xx

  6. January 28, 2019 / 10:05 pm

    This resonates so much right now, and I feel for you I really do. I have people telling me he is like it because I am his safe place but it doesn’t make it any easier does it? I’m hoping it is a short lived phase and everything will ‘click’. Sending you hugs.

    • Laura Dove
      Author
      January 29, 2019 / 2:06 pm

      Yes!! I hear the same but at the time when she’s been screaming for 7 hours solid it doesn’t make it easier. I really hope things settle for all of us. Lots of love xx

  7. January 29, 2019 / 7:55 am

    Parenting is such hard work, this actually made me cry because I feel the same way sometimes when it looks like I am failing as a mum. My little girl said to me the other day that she couldn’t have chosen a better mum, she knows things are hard and she loves me so much for coping. It made me so tearful. I love how honest you are being and that you will help other struggling mums that read this too. You are an awesome mum! Laura, you rock.

    • Laura Dove
      Author
      January 29, 2019 / 2:07 pm

      Thank you so much Vicky. I think that’s the main thing isn’t it? Even on the days we feel as though we are failing, they always love us. That’s so adorable that your daughter said that to you. Parenting is SO hard though, I’m not sure it will ever get easier? xx

  8. January 29, 2019 / 9:10 am

    Oh my goodness we have definitely had extended periods of this so I know how hard this must be – children are sent to test us and their boundaries aren’t they but just know you are definitely mum enough!!

    • Laura Dove
      Author
      January 29, 2019 / 2:08 pm

      Thanks Talya, it’s just draining when it continues, for us and for her too. I feel so sad that she is battling with all of these emotions, I just hope things improve for all our sakes. xx

  9. January 29, 2019 / 9:57 am

    This is precious, I woke up 4 times last night to feed my boy and now after reading this it’s fine I can do it again. I was so annoyed and I have just been complaining to myself how tired I am but it’s all worth it no more beating myself up. They will grow anyway so I might as well enjoy these moments. Thank you for this such a lovely letter to Meggy.

    • Laura Dove
      Author
      January 29, 2019 / 2:09 pm

      Thank you Joan. They grow so fast and cherishing every moment is important but also acknowledging that it’s hard work along the way is absolutely fine too. Us Mums are pretty amazing aren’t we? xx

  10. Janet
    January 29, 2019 / 11:26 am

    My own two daughters are now grown. I struggled especially with one of them and it’s heartbreaking and sometimes you feel so alone. Looking back though I learned so much and the years pass so quickly.

    • Laura Dove
      Author
      January 29, 2019 / 2:09 pm

      Ah definitely! It feels like you’re the only one dealing with it at the time. Thank you commenting xx

  11. January 29, 2019 / 12:04 pm

    I admit I have tears in my eyes while reading this. Parenting can be so hard at times. I have 5 kids (now grown) and all of them had different personalities and my oldest always pushed me to my limits. She now owns a very successful company and is a great leader.

    • Laura Dove
      Author
      January 29, 2019 / 2:10 pm

      Ahh that is SO reassuring to hear. I’m sure that Meggy will grow into the most amazing, assertive and successful young woman but we do always joke, god help her husband!! hehe. xx

  12. candy
    January 29, 2019 / 12:33 pm

    This is what every mother has experienced and wondered it is me, what am I doing wrong. Glad you went and talked to her teacher. Gives new insight.

    • Laura Dove
      Author
      January 29, 2019 / 2:11 pm

      Thank you Candy, yes definitely. It was a relief to share it thats for sure! xx

  13. January 29, 2019 / 1:13 pm

    This is such a sweet letter to your daughter! They grow so fast! I have a wild daughter too, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

    • Laura Dove
      Author
      January 29, 2019 / 2:11 pm

      Thank you Amber. These wild ones are pretty special aren’t they? xx

  14. January 29, 2019 / 2:07 pm

    Sounds like you have a beautifully strong willed child. When she’s an adult it will definitely help her in life. Hang in there Mom you’re doing a great job!!

    • Laura Dove
      Author
      January 29, 2019 / 2:12 pm

      Thank you so much Jeanette. I’m hanging on for dear life… xx

  15. January 29, 2019 / 2:30 pm

    I’m sure writing this has to be therapeutic. Your love for your child shines through, and you are clearly a great mother.

  16. January 29, 2019 / 3:07 pm

    She is so beautiful it would be hard not to want to give her the world if you could. I give you credit for getting over all the hurdles that parenting is giving you and coming out on top.

  17. January 29, 2019 / 4:49 pm

    This is written so beautifully. Now I really want to write a letter to each of my kids. You highlighted what many parents feel, the feeling of failure. I could have written many of the things you wrote word for word. All 5 of kids do what your Meggy does…they are good for teachers but then come home and switch their behavior. You wrote something that is so true. Kids are figuring out their world around them. I recently saw an explanation as to why kids fall apart with their parents and it is because they know we will love them no matter what. We are their safe place to do that. As a mom, I am in the same boat as you and you are not alone. If you ever want another mom in your corner please contact me. Hugs!

  18. January 29, 2019 / 5:04 pm

    What an emotional read. You have one very lovely and understanding teacher there too. Your little lady sounds like my youngest…all be it he is one of a pair of twins. He swings so strongly emotionally it seems unreal. He has done from around 2 and he nearly breaks me every time we enter this phase, that lasts a few months before he levels out for a while until he hits the next rough patch. It is almost like something grows first before his brain and emotions can catch up with him. He is perfect in school, but at home he’s angry, strops everywhere, and cries at the slightest issue. Someone once said something to me when I questioned our eldest coming out of school and being a nightmare at home…..it is like they are holding themselves together for so much of the day at school, that when they come out they are so tired from that effort it all falls apart for them, but they feel secure enough with their parents to let it show…..just some thoughts and to let you know you are definitely not alone on this xxxx

  19. January 29, 2019 / 5:07 pm

    Oh bless you both, it must be so hard and confusing for you both to be going through this, to not know what to do to make it all better. I hope things get calmer and Meggie finds some peace with whatever is making right now so hard and difficult for her.

  20. January 29, 2019 / 6:11 pm

    Sounds like you have both had a rough ride. It is certainly not easy and hard not to take the blame. My relationship with my daughter can be very similar. Big hugs x

  21. Jesusa Gilliam
    January 29, 2019 / 6:19 pm

    I understand your pain, my son started school this past August. There are days I pick him up from school and he is in the worst mood, it makes me feel like he’s mad at me for some reason. But then there are other days where he brings colored pages home for me and so happy to tell me about his day. I’m hoping it is just a stage they are going through at this age.

  22. January 29, 2019 / 6:26 pm

    Parenting is a hard job. I always say it is better for kids to act out at home so they can be good for others. It will get easier as they get older.

  23. January 29, 2019 / 6:49 pm

    Such an excellent post. I can actually feel your emotions while reading it. Parenting is not easy and it’s important to remind yourself that you’re doing the best you can.

  24. January 29, 2019 / 7:28 pm

    Parenting is hard, and I always had the same comments from my Daughters teachers, they heard her one day in one of her moods and were shocked to see her like that. I was always told they act up at home and for mum and dad because that is where they feel safe, and can let go of emotions. Am always here to talk to anytime x

  25. January 29, 2019 / 7:39 pm

    You’re an amazing mother. Glad that you were able to speak with her teacher and she totally understood. This post really gave me a flashback to my sons freshman year of high school year last.

  26. January 29, 2019 / 8:22 pm

    I know how hard its been for you and the whole family. I’m just so pleased that when you reached out for help, you got the response you did. Whatever the future holds, you didn’t betray her, you did it to try and understand her better and she will know that. x

  27. bryanna
    January 29, 2019 / 10:20 pm

    I’m seriously crying. This was such a heartfelt and honest post and it’s beautiful. I’m sorry you’ve had such a hard time but it’s so good to hear she speaks so lovingly of you. sending positive vibes and kind thoughts your way xx

  28. January 29, 2019 / 10:39 pm

    Oh, Laura, you make me cry and I can only imagine what have you been through. You are a lovely mama and although I only met you online, I know you are an amazing soul. Home is the ideal place for letting emotions going on so I bet on that. Be strong honey!

  29. January 29, 2019 / 10:41 pm

    I understand this. Totally. Our ‘gem’ at school was a devil at home. For us we realised that she’d spent all day at school, behaving, controlling her emotions and holding everything in and everything together. Then at home time it’s like pulling the plug out. A ticking timebomb. For us it got better – I hope it does for you too x

  30. Beth
    January 30, 2019 / 1:36 am

    Parenting is incredibly hard at times, but it is obvious how much you love your daughter. It sounds like Meg has a wonderful teacher and I’m glad she was able to support you.

  31. January 30, 2019 / 2:51 am

    So touching &inspiring. I have heard on multiple occasions that parenting is unique with each child &each parent. I’m sure no mistakes were made when putting you and Meg together

  32. January 30, 2019 / 3:05 am

    I can see so much love in your writing and in how you see your baby girl. It’s tough, parenting is not easy and there’s never a perfect formula. You’ll both continue to figure it out, together, and love each other fiercely as you do!! XOXO

  33. January 30, 2019 / 3:08 am

    I love these pieces that you write about your children. They are beautiful and legacy pieces for your family.

  34. January 30, 2019 / 5:29 am

    This really spoke to me and shows me what an incredible Mom you are. She’s going to read this when she’s older and love it.

  35. January 30, 2019 / 6:22 am

    Oh wow what a brutally honest, touching read. I think so many parents will be able to relate to your words. Thank you for sharing xxx

  36. January 30, 2019 / 8:52 am

    Great read. I love your story, so touching and inspiring.

  37. January 30, 2019 / 9:10 am

    Oh this is beautiful Laura. I’m so sorry you are both having such a hard time right now but I know you will both get through it because of the love you have for each other x

  38. Elizabeth O
    January 30, 2019 / 9:19 am

    Parenting is not so easy and single parenting is really very hard. This post is really excellent and touchy. Thanks for sharing this one. E

  39. Catalina
    January 30, 2019 / 11:38 am

    Beautiful letter! Your daughter is lucky to have a mother like you. All parents have tough moments, someone more often other – less. But we need to concentrate on the happy moments.

  40. January 30, 2019 / 11:46 am

    Sounds like she is totally trying to make sense of the world and her place in it. So sorry to hear you are having behavioural problems with her x fingers crossed it’s just a phase and she’ll settle x You’re doing a great job mummy x

  41. January 30, 2019 / 12:01 pm

    I know we’ve spoken about this before – it’s SO hard having such a spirited little one isn’t it. But we would do anything for them. A beautiful post from you, as always!

  42. January 30, 2019 / 12:12 pm

    This broke my heart reading this with someone with multiple chronic illnesses. I hope your little girl gets to read this letter one day. I don’t think it’s personal, I think the world is just unfair unfortunately 🙁 It is good to find out what is wrong so you can move forward x

  43. January 30, 2019 / 1:18 pm

    We’re acrually going through a kind of same patch with Alessai . Parenting can be tough . I’m sure there is light at the end of the tunnel for both of us xx

  44. January 30, 2019 / 2:07 pm

    This brought tears to my eyes. I really feel for you Laura. Parenting is the hardest job we ever have to do and no one prepares you for the highs and lows, the ups and downs. We’re going through a tough time with our son who has developed a fear of the dark. Nothing like what you’ve been going through with Megan but it’s been tough especially at night. I think how you’ve handled things where her teachers are concerned is brilliant and I’m glad you were met with support rather than being fobbed off. I hope Megan gets through whatever this is soon if only to make your time together after school more fun xxx

  45. January 30, 2019 / 2:16 pm

    Meggy is such a beauty. Your letter is so sweet and heartwarming. And it reminds me of that time I wrote my son a letter too. Parenting can be tough, but I wouldn’t change it for the world. Kids are a blessing.

  46. Whitney Kutch
    January 30, 2019 / 5:04 pm

    What an amazing glimpse into parenthood this gave me! Beautifully written and you have a gorgeous little one who will do amazing things! Keep at it, Mama 🙂

  47. January 30, 2019 / 5:12 pm

    I can relate sort of. My daughter can be impossible sometimes and she is around the same age as Megan.

  48. January 30, 2019 / 6:12 pm

    This is such a touching letter! Thank you for sharing it with us. I do get it though — I have a daughter with special needs and sometimes it’s difficult to deal with her. She’s a teen now. For both of us, it will get better!

  49. Claire Lee
    January 30, 2019 / 6:29 pm

    Aw, this is a beautiful letter, really came to me even though I don’t have children. I was thinking about my parents. Beautiful photos too.. Can’t imagine how difficult parenting is. and what we do for love.

  50. January 30, 2019 / 6:54 pm

    I am sorry to hear that Meggy has been poorly, it must be so worrying. I had a tough time with Isaac for a few years but he seems to have come out the other side now, so hopefully that will happen for you too

  51. January 30, 2019 / 9:20 pm

    Beautifully written Laura, I am having similar problems with Monkey the side the school gets and the side I get are very different. He’s me all over though and I am sure it’s partly because we are so alike. I’m hoping we will be out the other side soon – keeping everything crossed for you too x

  52. January 30, 2019 / 9:21 pm

    Beautiful post, like ever, thank you for sharing I can relate so much, my youngest seems to be very similar.

  53. January 30, 2019 / 9:23 pm

    I hope your little girl gets all of the help she needs to be well. She’s such a beauty!

  54. January 30, 2019 / 9:45 pm

    This is so touching and inspiring. I can’t imagine what you went through and you seem so strong <3

  55. January 30, 2019 / 11:31 pm

    Parenting is such a hard gig. It’s not unusual for kids to be on their best behaviour at school and then unravel when they get home. It’s a sign that they feel safe and they trust you enough to let themselves go.

  56. Wendy
    January 31, 2019 / 7:27 am

    So sorry you are having such a difficult time. I do feel like I could have written lots of this abou my Leo who is also 5 and a half. He’s so good in school but so disobedient and angry at hone lots of the time. The whole ticking time bomb after school? I totally get that. I’m glad Meggys teacher was supportive, I hopehinga get better for you all. Sending you lots of positivity from another mummy of a wild one xx

  57. January 31, 2019 / 10:04 am

    Such a hard post for you to have written, something that most parents can connect to at one point or another.

  58. January 31, 2019 / 12:26 pm

    Being a mom is hard work for sure. It does get easier my children are now 24 and 26. Remember their are always hard time we all go through as parents.

  59. claire talks beauty
    January 31, 2019 / 2:32 pm

    As you said being a parent is hard work and your words are so real ! i am glad that Meggy’s teacher was really supportive 🙂

  60. January 31, 2019 / 4:07 pm

    This was the most beautifully honest post I have ever read. I feel the same constantly, my daughter is 13 and I get the very worst of her at times. I used to think she hated me but then, like you, I was told by her teacher how fondly and lovingly she spoke about me. I knew in that moment that we were both going to be okay x

  61. Helen
    January 31, 2019 / 8:47 pm

    This is so moving Laura. I’m so sorry you’re all having a tough time of it at the moment and really hope you get to the bottom of what is upsetting Meg. Being a parent is hard work and you’re doing a brilliant job.

  62. January 31, 2019 / 10:05 pm

    Beautiful post, yes my first born who is 9 years old is also switch here are there in filck of second. I know parenting is not that easy. She is teaching me everyday how my mommy role get better. Buy the Meggy is really cute. Enjoy being mom that is wonderful gift we got it.

  63. Bindu Thomas
    February 1, 2019 / 7:44 am

    Cute baby! So sorry for having such a difficult time for your family. This is really a touching and inspiring one.

  64. February 1, 2019 / 9:53 am

    Not gonna lie, I sobbed when I read this. Oscar is just the same. And he’s the same age as Meg. His teacher’s always say they wish they had a class full of boys like him, but at home he just whinges, whines, tells me he hates me, trashes rooms in anger and lots more besides. It makes me feel like such a bad mum. Even though deep down I know I always try my best. I really hope things start to improve for you guys soon. I’m sure it will. The kids always look so happy in your pics 🙂

    Louise x

  65. Sundeep
    February 1, 2019 / 11:38 am

    I really liked the way you wrote about your kid. Meggy is so adorable. This is so touching

  66. Rebecca
    February 3, 2019 / 8:00 pm

    This was such an amazing read. I can’t pretend I’m in the same position as you because I don’t have kids but I do have a 12 year old sister (Eilidh) who is testing and breaking us all every single day. At school she is the model pupil, top grades in all her classes, lots of friends, loved by all the staff but the minute she gets home her entire demeanour changes, she turns into a horrible, manipulative, self destructive monster and we are all at our wits end. My mum and dad split up 3 years ago due to horrible circumstances and due to this Eilidh was let away with a lot due to my mum needing and wanting a easier life, she herself had so much to deal with she just let E get on with things as she didn’t have the energy to correct her. Now 3 years down the line my mum has a new partner, my dad is getting re-married and I have a boyfriend. Poor Eilidh feels like the odd one out, she believes my mum doesn’t love her as much as she has a new man, she is absolutely vile to mums partner- gives him the dirtiest of looks, Call him horrid names, doesn’t speak to him, and the list goes on. She has no understanding of how her behaviour makes the family feel. She doesn’t get why she is being punished after so long being let away with things. She throws tantrums like a two year old but doesn’t get why that is wrong. We are all at our wits end and really don’t know what to do. My dad rarely has her so we have to deal with it all alone- it’s exhausting.
    However the hardest part for me is the knowledge of how lovely and kind Eilidh can be and I struggle seeing her being so vile. I hate how mums partner views her and doesn’t get to see how nice she can be and I hate walking on egg shells constantly.
    We are all praying that High School will be the turning point for her. She starts in August and I really hope it will bring about positive changes.
    Hope you all can get a bit of a break and get your lovely Meggy back soon. Lots of Love ❤️❤️

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