For Meggy on your first day of primary school

Meggy,

How is it possible that you, my little Meggy, will be starting school tomorrow? Sat here now, looking at your uniform carefully ironed and placed on the hanger, your shoes all shiny and new just waiting to be worn, your book bag sitting at the door, hoping not to be forgotten, everything is ready…….apart from me.

And it’s funny because I genuinely didn’t think that I would feel this way. I didn’t expect to wake every morning with that niggling feeling of worry in the pit of my stomach, crossing off the days with a heavy heart, willing time to slow down just a little, wishing that the Summer could last forever. Because as much as I thought that I’d be revelling in the idea of a moments peace, a tidy home, an empty washing basket, the thought of laying on the couch eating Wispa’s and chilling with the Silver Fox, I’m really not. 

Born just fifteen months after your sister, from the moment you were placed into my arms, screaming like the drama queen we came to know, you have caused me more stress and worry than all four of your siblings put together. When Harry was born just twelve months (and four days) later, after an agonising first year struggling with your health issues, I felt very guilty that at one year old you were no longer the baby of the family. I still do.

That first year was tough and, although I had everything I ever wanted, I still struggled to get out of bed each morning, to go through the same rigmarole of nappies and bottles, the washing and cleaning, the incessant screaming and crying, the daily grind which, quite frankly, drove me insane.

There were days when you would whine pretty much from start to finish, when one of you would wake just as the others nodded off, when I would sit, surrounded by dirty dishes and empty bottles, with greasy hair and sick stained clothes, praying for the minutes to tick by until bedtime.

There were weeks when I lay on the couch, watching Mr bloody Tumble on repeat, questioning whether anybody had actually died a Cbeebies inflicted death, the three of you clambering all over me, fighting it out for prime spot on my lap, and I would wish away the moments, longing to fast forward to a time where life would suddenly become more manageable

With every passing month I told myself that things would get easier; when I threw away the steriliser, the formula, the tiny little weaning spoons and orange stained dishes, I told myself that we were on the home straight. When I waved goodbye to the Moses basket, the double buggy, to all three of you in nappies, I assumed that a full nights sleep, a hot meal and a moments peace were just around the corner.

And then you turned two, and everything went pear shaped. I lost count of the number of days which ended in tears because of your behaviour, the fact that you were just so angry, so aggressive, so incredibly emotional. Every day stuck indoors would result in me tearing my hair out, every day out would end with you lying on the floor, kicking, crying and screaming blue murder. And every night I would lie in bed just counting down the moments until you started pre-school and I would finally have a moment to just breathe.

At three I had hoped that life would get easier, that, with the changes we had seen in you since starting pre-school, you would feel a little less frustrated, a little more capable of controlling your emotions, a little less likely to spend your entire day screeching. Yet with you only doing fifteen hours a week at pre-school I had over looked one major issue – the fact that together, you and Harry were out to destroy me!

 

With a wicked sense of humour and both completely defiant strong willed, the two of you together are a dangerous mix. Whilst I promised myself that we would make the most of every day together, cherishing every moment before you went off to school this year, enjoying the fact that we could finally leave home without a full on military operation, my plans were soon scuppered by your constant crying, the two of you lashing out over every little thing, wrestling each other into headlocks, taunting me with your villainous laughs which left me muttering, “Roll on September!”…

And I hold my hands up and admit that I have made so many mistakes along the way, I could have handled things very differently, allowed others to help when I was struggling, recognised that so much of your behaviour was simply about vying for your place in the family. It took me far too long to realise that the things which make you different are the things which make you special, that you simply feel things more than other children, you know more, you hurt more, you love more, and that beneath your anger and frustration is the sweetest little girl just wanting to be understood.

And yet you forgave me it all. 

And now here we are, September, and here I am, crying at my laptop, knowing that right now I would give just about anything to go back in time, and do it all again.

And do it better.

I would give anything to go right back to that moment when you were placed in my arms, when you wrapped your hand around my little finger, looked at me with those big blue eyes of yours, and I knew that I would do everything in my power to keep you safe.

To be woken by the sound of your new born cries, six, seven, eight times a night, to mumble under my breath as I made up another bottle, praying that it would soothe you before you woke your siblings. To trundle that double buggy down the road each day, weighted down with Harry in the baby carrier, the nappy bag flung over one shoulder, plodding along like an old bag lady, forcing myself to smile each time somebody told me, “You’ve got your hands full!”.

To go back to those days when we lay on the couch in our pyjama’s, watching your favourite film, The Lion King, on repeat until you could recite every word, a moment of calm amongst so much chaos. To the days in the garden, the park, the beach, when the sound of your laughter carried on the wind, your eyes sparkling, your little face filled with such joy and happiness, the days when you reminded me just how completely wonderful you were.

To your first birthday, the celebrations, the candles and cake; to first Christmas’s, the shrieks of excitement, the grateful kisses and warmest of hugs; to our holidays, our Easter days, our every days, the moments when every tear, every tough day, every penny was worth it ten times over.

And I would give just about anything to go back to those days when I had cried at how desperately hard life seemed, when I had wished for the time to hurry up, when I had wondered why you wouldn’t stop screaming for just one moment…..and I’d take it all back, I’d say I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it, I enjoyed every single moment of that time…..

I just didn’t realise it ’til now.

Because all of a sudden my baby girl has grown, not even a baby at all, and in the blink of an eye those crazy days are gone. And tomorrow when I wave you goodbye at the gate, I know that my heart will break a little, filled with sadness and regret that I wished away so much of the last four years.

I’m so sorry for snapping when I was tired and grumpy, for losing my patience far too often, for trying so hard to keep myself afloat that I forgot to enjoy every moment. I’m sorry that I allowed the pressures of being a parent, of being human, to get the better of me at times, for being too quick to anger, to tell you, “God help you when you go to school!” and “School won’t know what’s hit them!”. Because the truth is, you will be an absolute credit to that school and they will be so very lucky to have you. I envy them those six hours a day when you will be theirs and not mine.

Because the truth is, you are the sweetest, most hilarious, kind, beautiful, talented, loving and dramatic little girl I will ever have the pleasure of knowing, and I am so very proud of you. You are so excited to join Eva at “big school”, having waited on the side lines for twelve long months, pining for your best friend, and I just know that you being there is going to be such a huge comfort to her.

And although Harry and I will miss you tremendously, you are more than ready for school, so desperate to learn, to read, to be able to write down the most wonderful stories which you tell us daily. And I can’t wait to hear all about it.

Right now, starting from tomorrow, this is your time to shine. And you can be anything at all you want to be my darling girl (even though right now you insist that you want to be a builder), but promise me one thing, okay?

Don’t ever change.

You are absolutely perfect just the way you are, my beautiful, crazy, precious little NutMeg.

Love you all the stars in the sky,

Mummy

xxxxxxx

 

 

Follow:

178 Comments

  1. September 4, 2017 / 7:10 pm

    All the feels!!!!! This is so going to be me in two years time! Good luck Meggy (and you too Laura!) xxx

    • Laura Dove
      September 4, 2017 / 10:29 pm

      Ahh thank you lovely, I have it all to come again next September too! xx

  2. September 4, 2017 / 7:22 pm

    Oh Laura! Amazing post as usual. You’ve done amazingly, don’t think of yourself anything less than the amazing Mum that you are! They’re all that they are because of you.

    Have a fabulous day Meg!

    • Laura Dove
      September 4, 2017 / 10:29 pm

      Thank you Emma, I think we always feel we could have done more. She is such an amazing little girl, emotional times tomorrow though! xx

  3. September 4, 2017 / 8:38 pm

    Waaaah I really feel for you!! Beautiful post. Hope it goes well for you both zx

    • Laura Dove
      September 4, 2017 / 10:27 pm

      Thank you Susie. xxx

  4. September 4, 2017 / 9:33 pm

    What a wonderful love letter,I am in awe of parents of more then one child…their devotion and love to their little flock is a wonderful lesson in patience and kindness. Thank you for sharing this one with us,Laura!!

    • Laura Dove
      September 4, 2017 / 10:26 pm

      Ahh thank you Patrick. Megan is very special and a real character! xx

  5. September 4, 2017 / 11:43 pm

    Aw Meggy. She has so much personality and so much vibrancy and looking back at how she has evolved over the years has been a beautiful story to behold. You should never beat yourself up for when you are angry because that’s all part of parenting. You are a great role model x

  6. September 5, 2017 / 1:03 am

    That is so beautiful! I remember when my youngest started kindergarten. I cried and was in awe and in shock at how fast the time went. Now he’s in the fifth grade and I still can’t believe. Sometimes I just wish time would slow down, even if only a little so I can cherish my baby boy more. I feel you:) #mg

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 8:30 am

      Thank you Michelle, I think every parent will agree that time goes way too fast when you have a little one. My eldest is 13 now so I know all about that, if only we could rewind….xx

  7. September 5, 2017 / 2:04 am

    What a heartfelt letter..I could relate to it so much..My younger daughter who’s 3 has gives me hard times and i felt after reading this as if I am not alone..And you know i feel the guilt every night when i yell at my kids..
    And your kids are adorable..loved your daughter’s expressions in the pics..beautifully captured.

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 8:29 am

      Ahh thank you so much Neha. It’s hard isn’t it, some days I feel like all I do is shout at them, I guess we have to remember the amazing times we share with them too. xx

  8. September 5, 2017 / 6:32 am

    Aaaah this post! All the feels woman. A beautifully written and super sweet post. Such adorable kids, honestly…and those photos you capture? STUNNING! I hope she has a great day! x

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 8:26 am

      Ahh thank you so much lovely, she isn’t in until this afternoon so hopefully things will go well! xx

  9. September 5, 2017 / 6:52 am

    Today is the day!

    This hit me right in the feels! Im all watery eyed on the bus. What a beautiful post! I think I’m guilty of focusing on keeping myself afloat so i don’t drown and i feel stressed as a parent, fiance and parent and it will eventually prevent me from enjoying moments. You might not be able to go back in time but it’s made me want to act differently!! X

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 8:21 am

      Ahh thank you so much Lucie. It’s so hard when you’re juggling so much, I feel like I forget to breathe some days, let alone enjoy the moment! xx

  10. September 5, 2017 / 7:11 am

    I’m actually dreading the day my daughter is old enough to go to school… It’s going to be so hard!

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 8:19 am

      It really is, they grow way too fast. xx

  11. September 5, 2017 / 7:52 am

    Oh this has got me so emotional and my daughter is still two years away from going to school! I really hope she has a lovely time at school, sending you all the strength 🙂

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 8:19 am

      Thank you, she isn’t in until 1 today so we are just sitting and waiting, very nervous but she can’t wait! xx

  12. September 5, 2017 / 8:05 am

    Lovely post, you sound like a good mum! Cherrish the years, my youngest starts high school this week and it feels like yesterday that my oldest started primary!

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 8:17 am

      Ahh thank you. My eldest went into his third year of high school yesterday so I know that feeling well! xx

  13. September 5, 2017 / 8:26 am

    Your family is gorgeous!!! And I am wishing the best for your little beautiful princess!

  14. September 5, 2017 / 8:52 am

    Oh darling I totally get this! My daughter is starting school this year too although very late on in the month – 20th September! – but I really hope it goes well for her darling sending lots of positive vibes xoxo

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 11:11 pm

      Ahh thank you. She had an amazing day! I really hope that your daughter settles well too. xxx

  15. September 5, 2017 / 8:53 am

    Yes I know this feeling. My youngest starts nursery soon and I can’t believe her time at home is almost over. Where does the time go?? I hope Megan has a brilliant time at school and that she settles quickly (and that you can adjust quickly too as it will be a big change) #dreamteam

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 11:10 pm

      Thanks lovely, she had an amazing first day! I hope your youngest enjoys nursery! xx

  16. Karen, the next best thing to mummy
    September 5, 2017 / 9:12 am

    Such beautiful photos, where does the time go? My youngest granddaughter has just started school she was so excited that she almost made herself sick when buying the uniform! #triamphanttales@_karendennis

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 11:09 pm

      Ahh that’s so like Meggy, she was bouncing off the walls! xx

  17. September 5, 2017 / 9:30 am

    Aww how fab and such lovely photos. Time just goes far too quickly these days, makes me feel old! Hope starting school goes well and she enjoys it 🙂

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 11:08 pm

      Thank you! xx

  18. September 5, 2017 / 9:38 am

    Oh bless her, she looks so angelic. They are only little for a short time. I hope she has lots of fun at school with her sister x

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 11:08 pm

      Thank you, although looks are very deceiving, haha! She had a fab day! xx

  19. September 5, 2017 / 9:46 am

    Ah, and you have me in tears again Laura. Once. Again! What a beautiful beautiful little soul Meggy is. And all of your children! I love your photos – they’re always so full of fun and character. And beauty and perfection at the same time! Thanks so much for linking up at #KCACOLS. Hope to see you again next time!

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 11:07 pm

      Ahh thank you so much Sara, I really appreciate you reading!! She is such a beautiful soul you’re right, I’m incredibly lucky that she is mine xxx

      • September 6, 2017 / 10:23 pm

        By the way, this means Harry will be in school in Sept 2018, right? (Like my littlest one). Then I hope you have a steady plan to get writing fiction – you know that’s what you’re meant to do, right? xx

  20. deanne howartg
    September 5, 2017 / 10:55 am

    Aaaah so beautifully written. Xxx stay strong Laura! 💗💗💗 xx

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 11:05 pm

      Thanks lovely. xx

  21. September 5, 2017 / 11:40 am

    Oh my. This post. So beautifully written <3 Hope she has an amazing first day. x

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 11:05 pm

      Thank you so much. xx

  22. September 5, 2017 / 1:33 pm

    Oh Laura, what a big day for Meggy. I love those photos of her – especially the Jumperoo one. She’s got so much personality, her character just comes through in every shot. I hope it goes well. x

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 11:03 pm

      Thank you lovely, she really is the most amazing little girl and although she is hard work at times (a lot of the time!), she is everyone’s favourite who ever meets her! xx

  23. September 5, 2017 / 3:30 pm

    Gosh, they grow up so fast don’t they? I do hope Meggy’s first day at school will be heaps of fun for her. I have no doubt that she will make new friends and she will have a wonderful teacher. I hope you took a picture in a smartly pressed uniform and shiny shoes. I am sure she looked lovely 🙂 You’re doing a wonderful job!!!

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 11:02 pm

      Thank you, she had a wonderful day! I will share a post this week of her all dressed up smart, she looked beautiful! xx

  24. September 5, 2017 / 4:04 pm

    Aww what an absolutely beautiful post, I have Meggy has a great first day at primary school.

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 11:00 pm

      Thank you Sarah, she had a wonderful day. xx

  25. September 5, 2017 / 4:29 pm

    Hope she had a lovely first day. Its crazy how time flies and how quickly it comes. You sound like your doing amazing job. Youll soon be writing about her first day at secondary. Makes me feel old. Id love to have one more day at school. Life was simple then haha

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 11:00 pm

      Thank you. My eldest is in year 9 and I am all too aware that in three years time Ill be writing about his first day at college!! Terrifying really! Life was way more simple at school! xx

  26. September 5, 2017 / 4:38 pm

    Laura, your posts always make me well up a bit as you are such a lovely mummy to your children. I have a boy who sounds so similar to your little Meggy. He was a stubborn and intense little boy who never sat still and had to fight to be heard (even though we heard him!). He’s now a mature, calm, intelligent and incredible young man who knows his own mind and continues to fight for the things he believes in and that is amazing. Good luck to Meggy. She will love school I’m sure and enjoy the new times to spend with your youngest. #dreamteam

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 10:59 pm

      Ahh thank you so much. That’s so good to hear that your son grew into such an incredible young man, I have no doubt that Megan will grow into someone completely wonderful. She is such a special little girl but wow, she is hard work at times!!! xx

  27. September 5, 2017 / 5:40 pm

    Hit me in the gut – my youngest starts reception in a week. I’m a bit gutted and the realisation that’s it’s no longer me teaching her, being there for her all day… urk. In the gut. #kcacols

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 10:57 pm

      Ahh it’s so hard isn’t it? It terrifies me how fast the time goes. Good luck next week. xxx

  28. September 5, 2017 / 5:45 pm

    This will be me in 2 years! I’m dreading the day already and really I still have a long time to go! Hope all goes well for her 🙂 x

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 10:57 pm

      Ahh bless you, it comes around SO fast! xx

  29. September 5, 2017 / 6:33 pm

    What a beautiful open letter to your daughter x you sound like an amazing mum! I start BIG school next week and my mummy can’t quite believe it either x #DreamTeam

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 10:56 pm

      Oh wow, good luck to you! I hope you love it! xx

  30. September 5, 2017 / 7:48 pm

    Your children are so beautiful and Meggy sounds like she has a very strong willed personality. I hope that she has a wonderful first day at school.

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 10:55 pm

      Thank you so much Odette xx

  31. September 5, 2017 / 7:53 pm

    She looks like such a little angel – hard to believe she could be difficult to handle. From your post it seems like you have so many wonderful memories and I don’t think you should be sorry / feel bad for accepting that it was difficult to be a parent at times. You clearly love all of your children and know them well.

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 10:55 pm

      Thank you so much. Oh she was hard work that’s for sure, she still can be, but I think she is so ready for school and it will be the making of her. xx

  32. Joline
    September 5, 2017 / 8:06 pm

    Awwww this gave me all the feels. Why does time have to go by so fast? I’m not a very sentimental person but as I grow older I find myself pausing and cherishing the little things more. Oh how many things I’ve taken for granted! Your little angle is adorable. Wish you guys many more lovely shared moments together!

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 10:54 pm

      Thank you so much Joline. I think pausing and enjoying the moment is SO important, life is so busy and it really is so easy to forget. xx

  33. September 5, 2017 / 8:53 pm

    Such an emotive piece Laura! Time goes by so quickly and before you know it the babies are not babies anymore. I’m dreading next year when Reuben goes…… #TriumphantTales

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 10:54 pm

      It’s crazy how fast the time goes! Harry starts next year too, I’ve had three consecutive years of this emotional rollercoaster! xx

  34. September 5, 2017 / 9:33 pm

    I love this! So very relatable. It’s so gut wrenching when they first start school. I hope she had a wonderful day.

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 10:53 pm

      Thank you Jenny, she had the best day! xx

  35. September 5, 2017 / 9:51 pm

    How did it go? Hope she had a wonderful day. And don’t worry you still have plenty of time together. She is still very little x

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 10:52 pm

      She had a wonderful first day thank you so much! xx

  36. September 5, 2017 / 10:52 pm

    First day at school must be a nervous time for any parent. Hope all went well and I must say that those navy patent shoes are so cute! 🙂 x

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 11:01 pm

      They are gorgeous aren’t they! She had a wonderful day thank you. xx

  37. September 5, 2017 / 10:56 pm

    Sending children off to school for the first time is always hard. I am sure she did great, and you’ll do better in time. Don’t worry about the mishaps that have happened over the years, she won’t remember most. All she is ever going to remember is how much love you give her.

    Alicia Trautwein | https://themomkind.com

    • Laura Dove
      September 5, 2017 / 11:11 pm

      Thank you, she had a wonderful day and you are so right, we have some amazing memories together and those are the ones she will treasure. xxx

  38. September 6, 2017 / 3:55 am

    First of all, I must say you have wonderful pictures of your lovely children, specially that lavender field one. Going first time to school is a new experience as kids are taking their first steps to face the world. Best of Luck!

    • Laura Dove
      September 6, 2017 / 12:10 pm

      Ahh thank you so much! xx

  39. September 6, 2017 / 7:10 am

    This is such a wonderful post! I have no children but I confess to getting a little misty-eyed when my niece and nephew started school – time sure flies! #fortheloveofBLOG

    • Laura Dove
      September 6, 2017 / 12:09 pm

      Ah bless, it really does! xx

  40. September 6, 2017 / 8:18 am

    I know just how you feel as just waved Sebby off at the school gates for the first time. I am going to miss my little sidekick

    • Laura Dove
      September 6, 2017 / 12:08 pm

      Aww Kara, I hope that he went in okay. xx

  41. September 6, 2017 / 8:25 am

    Such a beautiful post. I can’t imagine how I’ll feel when Willow goes to school!xo

    • Laura Dove
      September 6, 2017 / 12:07 pm

      It’s heartbreaking, I dread my youngest going! xx

  42. September 6, 2017 / 8:28 am

    This is such an adorable post, but never regret the things you did, I am sure you did a fantastic job bringing your children up and don’t think you should change a thing x

    • Laura Dove
      September 6, 2017 / 12:07 pm

      Ahh thank you so much Rhian. xxx

  43. September 6, 2017 / 9:04 am

    Aww what a lovely post Laura. I hope Meggy had a great first day at school. Oh wow, look at those shoes. I bet she loved wearing these 🙂

    • Laura Dove
      September 6, 2017 / 10:08 am

      She had an amazing first day, loved every minute! xx

  44. September 6, 2017 / 9:07 am

    It must be crazy to watch your children grow up so quickly in front of you!

    • Laura Dove
      September 6, 2017 / 10:08 am

      It really is! It happens so fast! xx

  45. September 6, 2017 / 9:11 am

    Aw, what a beautifully written heartfelt post, made me well up. They grow up far too fast don’t they.

    • Laura Dove
      September 6, 2017 / 10:05 am

      Thank you Emma. xx

  46. September 6, 2017 / 10:15 am

    I wouldn’t be so hard on yourself! No need to go back in time when you have such a lovely little girl on your hands!

  47. Joanna
    September 6, 2017 / 10:26 am

    That was such a heart warming letter and I am sure your daughter will really appreciate it once she grows a little bit older. It’s time to let her go and have her own adventures, about which she would tell you every day at dinner time 🙂

  48. September 6, 2017 / 11:36 am

    I love your pictures of your family and you have a beautiful family such a heart felt letter it really moved me #fortheloveofblog

    • Laura Dove
      September 6, 2017 / 5:34 pm

      Thank you so much. xxx

  49. September 6, 2017 / 12:31 pm

    This is a great little letter! And I’m actually really nervous about the day my daughter starts school… I don’t know how I’m going to deal with it, haha

  50. September 6, 2017 / 1:26 pm

    What a lovely post! Hope Meggy had a great first day at school! x

    • Laura Dove
      September 6, 2017 / 3:44 pm

      Thank you, she did! xx

  51. September 6, 2017 / 1:30 pm

    This literally made me sob. My girls are nearly 21 and I made lots of mistakes along the way. I wish I could turn back the time and do it all over, realising where I was going wrong along the way. I am lucky that they have turned out to be fantastic human beings, and I know your little Nutmeg will too x

    • Laura Dove
      September 6, 2017 / 3:42 pm

      Ahh sorry Tanya, but thank you so much. I think we are all guilty of making mistakes but we are only human and I know that my girls, and yours, will remember the happy times and not the times we shouted at them when we were tired and cranky. xxx

  52. September 6, 2017 / 2:30 pm

    Awe, this was such an emotional read. I could feel both your pain and happiness in the fact that she is growing up and getting independent and ready to venture out. You should never feel bad for doing things the way you did, as that’s what you were supposed to do as a parent, you could have done it differently but then both you and your NutMeg would have been different persons. Meggy is so precious, her eyes, her vibrancy, everything is magnetic. God bless her.

    • Laura Dove
      September 6, 2017 / 3:39 pm

      Ahh thank you so much Aditi, that really does mean the world to me. I needed to hear that today. xxx

  53. September 6, 2017 / 5:28 pm

    oh my gosh its such an emotional time isn’t it! Wilf just started year one! x

    • Laura Dove
      September 6, 2017 / 5:32 pm

      It really is, my eldest daughter just started year one too, big milestones! xx

  54. September 6, 2017 / 9:17 pm

    Wonderful post! Full of emotion, love. My kids are all grown now, I wished had the time back then to write a post like this to them, we all learn as we go through life, Kids learn, as do parents. Your doing and brilliant job, and have a beautiful family.

    • Laura Dove
      September 7, 2017 / 9:14 pm

      Thank you SO much, sometimes its lovely to hear that and remind myself that I’m not doing too bad a job after all. xxx

  55. September 6, 2017 / 9:56 pm

    Meggy will do fine. I can imagine how nervous you must have been. Kids grow up soooooo incredibly fast, don`t they ?!

  56. September 6, 2017 / 9:57 pm

    This had me in tears, such an emotional post. I hope she had a good first day x
    #TriumphantTales

  57. September 6, 2017 / 10:32 pm

    What a wonderful and moving post. A lovely heart felt letter, I hope she has had a fun and interesting first day getting to know all her new friends.

  58. September 7, 2017 / 7:32 am

    What a lovely, heartfelt post 🙂 They really do grow up so fast! I hope Meggy enjoys her new school 🙂

  59. September 7, 2017 / 8:24 am

    What an emotional post, I can relate to that feeling. How time flies and now, your baby is stepping to another milestone.

  60. September 7, 2017 / 10:56 am

    Oh this post brought all the feels, this will be me next year. My little girl goes to preschool for 15 hours a week, and I will admit I struggled a bit with that. I have no idea how I will cope with school next year. x #dreamteam

    • Laura Dove
      September 7, 2017 / 1:59 pm

      Ahh bless you, it really does go way too fast!! xx

  61. September 7, 2017 / 3:38 pm

    Awwww what a lovely letter, full of emotion. I hope the new chapter wen well for your girl and you X #stayclassymama

    • Laura Dove
      September 7, 2017 / 9:05 pm

      Thank you, she had a wonderful first day! xx

  62. September 7, 2017 / 3:45 pm

    Such a lovely post. Sounds from IG like she’s done well to settle at school as well.

    • Laura Dove
      September 7, 2017 / 9:05 pm

      Ahh thank you Emma, she is loving it! xx

  63. September 7, 2017 / 5:45 pm

    Such a beautiful read! Your little girls remind me so much of my Luke. The same sort of struggles and periods of extreme emotions that kind of consume your life for a little while. I love these pictures, she’s got so much character and sass – I love it! My favourite picture has to be the one with the lipstick 😉 #SharingTheBlogLove

    • Laura Dove
      September 7, 2017 / 6:54 pm

      Ahh thank you so much. It can be hard with a “spirited” child, I think a lot of families have one! Haha that’s one of my favourite photos too! xx

  64. September 7, 2017 / 7:39 pm

    Laura you have such a way of taking us to that place with you! Meggy sounds just like the Mouse…they’ll go far these feisty girls, but boy have they tested us!
    Best of luck, can’t wait to hear how she gets on x
    Thanks for linking up to #coolmumclub

    • Laura Dove
      September 7, 2017 / 9:07 pm

      Ahh thank you lovely. She had a wonderful first day at school and the only tears we had were from Eva – aghh! xx

  65. September 7, 2017 / 7:58 pm

    I got goose bumps while I was reading this post. It was so emotional and I remembered how I felt last year when I sent my nephew to school.

    • Laura Dove
      September 7, 2017 / 9:05 pm

      Ah thank you Elena. xx

  66. September 7, 2017 / 8:01 pm

    Oh what a lovely post! Such beautiful set of photos too. That last one of them together is SO stunning

  67. September 7, 2017 / 8:13 pm

    Feeling your pain – intensely! What a week it has been lovely. I too was in tears when I sat and wrote my post this week. I hope it’s of some comfort to know you are totally not alone in these feelings. I’ve felt sick for weeks and Monday was just awful knowing it was our last ever day together as ‘just us’ before everything changed! I hope your week is going well and that you are all coping. I can’t wait for the weekend! #coolmumclub

    • September 7, 2017 / 9:39 pm

      Popping back – Thanks for linking up to #TriumphantTales, hope to see you again next week! 🙂

      • Laura Dove
        September 8, 2017 / 8:45 am

        I’ll be there! xx

        • September 17, 2017 / 12:38 pm

          Popping back again, I clearly can’t get enough of this post! 😄 #sharingthebloglove x

  68. September 7, 2017 / 8:37 pm

    Oh this is so beautiful hun! Made me cry! I remember all those sleepless nights and the stress and I wish I could go back too.

  69. September 7, 2017 / 10:40 pm

    Oh goodness I am seriously crying my eyes out with a tissue box near me. The love you have for your daughter (and vice versa) is just so stunning and raw. It makes me appreciate how much my parents went through at every stage of my upbringing and how grateful and loved I felt and continue to feel to this day.

    • Laura Dove
      September 8, 2017 / 8:44 am

      Ahh Jennifer thank you so much, that’s so lovely of you to say. xxx

  70. September 7, 2017 / 11:18 pm

    What a beautiful letter! I love posts like this, it’s something so special for your children to look back on. They probably won’t remember the little things later on in life so it’ll make a lovely keepsake. The lipstick picture is hilarious and so adorable!

    Ps, I sympathise with you about me tumble! Arghhhhhhh

    • Laura Dove
      September 8, 2017 / 8:42 am

      Ahh thank you so much. She is such a character!! Haha Mr Tumble….bane of my life! xx

  71. September 7, 2017 / 11:38 pm

    Good lucky Miss Meggy on your first day at primary school! Something tells me you’re going to do great. One day you’ll look back at your mom’s blog and smile because you are so very loved. x

    • Laura Dove
      September 8, 2017 / 8:41 am

      Ahh thank you so much Ali. xx

  72. Anne Dela Cruz
    September 8, 2017 / 4:38 am

    Oh!! This is such a nice letter. I really feel you. I still remember my little ones. in the twilight where she will cry, cry for no reason, get lost, whatever we do, they don’t stop. Put her in my arms. I’ll just miss it. Now that my baby girl is 3 years old. She’s still my baby. Oops, baby no more 🙂 Lol!! You are so lucky Meggy to have this kind lovable mom. Great job!!!

    • Laura Dove
      September 8, 2017 / 8:31 am

      Ahh thank you so much Anne, parenting is so hard isn’t it? xx

    • Laura Dove
      September 8, 2017 / 8:26 am

      Thank you! xx

  73. September 9, 2017 / 8:03 pm

    aww you made me cry reading this. there are so many elements to your story that are the same as how i feel with my son and if i am honest my eldest daughter too.

    • Laura Dove
      September 9, 2017 / 8:17 pm

      I’m sorry this made you cry it it’s so reassuring to know you can relate. Parenting is tough isnt it? Xx

  74. September 9, 2017 / 9:39 pm

    Time races by so fast and I don’t feel that I have appreciate my children enough, always thinking ahead rather than focusing on the present. Anya starts infants in 2 days and I will miss her so much #stayclassymama

  75. September 10, 2017 / 2:53 am

    Gorgeous photos and sentiment. We all do get weepy as they enter school. We blink and they go from baby burrito’s to 7-year-olds and 9-year-olds and blink, how did this happen! Lovely post as always! xoxox

    • Laura Dove
      September 10, 2017 / 11:35 am

      It’s so hard for us parents but by four they are so ready! We’ve had a great week in school, I even had two hours to myself this week and managed a shower! Bonus!! xx

  76. September 10, 2017 / 7:17 am

    I’m tearing up Laura. The bits about wishing time would move forward and then sobbing to go back totally resonates. I often think it’s harder for us parents than the kids going off to school. I’m sitting here with Eva dreading tomorrow (Monday) when my baby, my youngest will finally be off to school. Where did the time go? Hope Meg enjoys it. #KCACOLS

    • Laura Dove
      September 10, 2017 / 11:33 am

      Ahh it’s so hard isn’t it? I really hope that Eva enjoys her first day, and I will be thinking of you too! Megs had a great week in school although she is sooooo tired now!! xx

  77. September 10, 2017 / 10:10 am

    Oh! Laura when I read your posts about your children I’m captivated by your immense of love of them all, you say everything that I would love to write about my children. Your honesty is incredible. My now 20 year old daughter has very similar traits as Meg especially the drama. But is also so loving.
    I hope she is starting to settle in school now. I love the bit about trying to get the best place on your lap. Reminded me of walking in town when the older ones were younger and my 20 year old was superglued to my leg haha!
    You really are fab writer and you will always be one of my favourites xx Thank you for linking to #ThatFridayLinky Please come back next week

    • Laura Dove
      September 10, 2017 / 11:29 am

      Ahh Nige, thank you so much. Your comments always give me that boost I need to believe in myself. I struggle when I share posts about Meggy because I often worry that it comes across badly when I describe how difficult I have found her over the years. I think so many parents can relate to feeling this way about their children though and I guess not everyone voices that because it’s far more acceptable to say how wonderful our children have been from day one. Megan absolutely loved her first day, she had a great week and I think that school will be the making of her. Thank you again for your lovely comment. xxx

  78. September 10, 2017 / 1:00 pm

    This brought a tear to my eye! (Again) as all your letters to your little ones do. Meggy looks like she’s so ready to set the world alight with her sparky personality. I can imagine that her talents will shine through at school, and if anything, will have her all worn out by the time she gets home. I hope the coming weeks go well for you all with the settling in. Thanks for joining us for the #DreamTeam xx

    • Laura Dove
      September 10, 2017 / 1:34 pm

      Ahh thank you Annette. She has had a wonderful week in school and settled in so well. Thank you for hosting, see you Tuesday! xx

    • Laura Dove
      September 10, 2017 / 6:33 pm

      Thanks again! xx

  79. September 11, 2017 / 12:31 am

    Aw the first day at school is always so memorable! I don’t remember starting primary school but im sure my mam does! xxx

    • Laura Dove
      September 11, 2017 / 11:46 am

      Ah I bet she does, it’s such a huge deal for us parents too! xx

  80. September 11, 2017 / 8:29 am

    she is just so amazing and you are both so lucky to have each other, you are truly such a beautiful person and mother xx #mg

    • Laura Dove
      September 11, 2017 / 11:40 am

      Ahh thank you so much Mac, I really appreciate that. xxx

  81. September 11, 2017 / 6:49 pm

    This is an absolutely beautiful post Laura. So honest and no matter what you think, it’s clear you’re an amazing mum to all of your children. I don’t think as parents we’ll ever feel that we did our best, or that we’re ready for them to take that next step. I know I’m dreading it being Max’s turn to start school next year – I’ve cried so many times reading people’s starting school posts I’m clearly going to be an absolute mess! Thanks so much for sharing this with us at #SharingtheBlogLove

  82. Rachel
    September 11, 2017 / 11:05 pm

    Awh this are all such great photos and this is such a lovely post! xo

  83. September 12, 2017 / 9:02 am

    You’ve done it again Mrs Dove, reaching for the tears here. Such a beautiful letter to Meggy and what a wonderful little girl she is. You are a brilliant mum to those children and they know it, even if you don’t believe it. Thank you for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove xx

  84. September 12, 2017 / 10:41 am

    It’s a cliche – but time really does fly past so quickly and I’m gutted that my 3 are all at school. Lovely post as always. sarah #fabfridaypost

  85. September 13, 2017 / 8:18 am

    Wow so many comments and I can see why! What gorgeous photographs and words to boot. I often get pangs of wishing I could turn back time and do it all again…properly. I know that I’ve made mistakes with both of my two girls (my boy not so much…yet!) who are strong-willed, super sensitive and very complicated! We’ve had a difficult struggle with both of them at times and I know that I’ve often done it ‘wrong’ but I think knowing that it makes us want to try hard and do better in the future. I have to try to find a silver lining somewhere! And you know what? Children are very forgiving and move on so quickly. Starting school is such a milestone and does make us reflect/long for the days gone by. But she looks so happy! I’m sure she will have a brilliant time and you will soon find a new groove in life. xx

    • Laura Dove
      September 13, 2017 / 8:34 pm

      Ahh thank you Suzanne. That’s so reassuring to know that you too feel you have made these mistakes, I think sometimes we beat ourselves up thinking we are the only ones. I’m sure in a long time from now, when our children have children of their own and are struggling, it will be good for them to read posts like this! Megan is the most wonderful little girl, she is going to have an absolute blast at school. xx

  86. September 13, 2017 / 4:31 pm

    Such a lovely post. It’s the end of an era but the start of exciting new chapters. I just don’t know where the time goes though. I feel like my eldest started in reception yesterday but she’s now in year 6 and at the end of her primary school journey – how did that happen? #StayClassyMama

    • Laura Dove
      September 13, 2017 / 8:30 pm

      Oh wow, big year for you next time! My eldest is in year 9, I just know no time at all will pass and he’ll be leaving school! xx

  87. September 14, 2017 / 8:18 pm

    I am quite emotional reading this. My first son is 18 and I still feel those first moments of his life so strongly. I don’t know how 18 years have gone be so quickly. #KCACOLS

  88. September 14, 2017 / 9:20 pm

    Oh my gosh this has made me so emotional!! I know exactly how you’re feeling, some days with my 2yo and 1yo I’m at my wits end and pretty much everyday I can’t wait until bed time. I really hate myself for feeling that way because I know as soon as my little Meelie monster starts school I’m going to be so lost without her! I really hope Megan loves school and it makes it a little easier for you to know that she’s having a great time! (And that she gets on a lot better than her big sister did!) #KCACOLS

  89. September 18, 2017 / 1:55 am

    I don’t even have kids, and I completely understand what you feel. Beautiful post and thank you for sharing.

    • Laura Dove
      September 18, 2017 / 10:09 am

      Ahh thank you so much. xx

  90. September 18, 2017 / 2:59 am

    I enjoyed reading your post! Meggy is so cute and hopes she enjoyed her first day at school! Can’t believe how time flies and kids grow so fast!

    • Laura Dove
      September 18, 2017 / 10:09 am

      Thank you Ana. xx

  91. September 18, 2017 / 7:32 am

    It’s s so hard to enjoy the sleepless nights and crying babes but thanks for the reminder that we really should cherish every single moment. Life as a parent is tough. Good luck at school Meggy, sounds like you will love it! #sharingthebloglove

    • Laura Dove
      September 18, 2017 / 10:06 am

      Thank you, she has really settled well and is enjoying it! xx

  92. September 18, 2017 / 4:35 pm

    What a lovely letter to your little girl. I hope she enjoyed her first day at primary school as much as I enjoyed reading this. She looks a bright and happy girl, it wont be long until you will be writing to her for her first day at university so love every minute of her growing up.

    • Laura Dove
      September 20, 2017 / 10:17 am

      Thank you Jenni, you’re so right. Time flies. xx

  93. Rox
    September 19, 2017 / 3:37 pm

    Oh goodness, how terrible sad that all little ones have to grow up one day…cherish all these moments forever!!!!

    • Laura Dove
      September 20, 2017 / 10:05 am

      Absolutely, time flies! xx

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *